He Asked: I’m in a committed relationship, but I get incredibly jealous when my girlfriend talks to other guys. Is this normal? How do I get over it?
The Answer: Yep. We have all experienced those familiar pangs of jealousy as the object of our affection chats up another potential match. However, those pangs should gradually subside as you travel deeper into a stable relationship and build a solid foundation of trust with your partner. Since you’re still feeling pretty protective, even though you’ve already entered the “committed” stage, we have two possibilities here. Either your girlfriend is giving you good cause to be concerned—or you’re letting your insecurities get the best of you. Let’s figure out which one it is, shall we?
1. The first step, then, is to pinpoint exactly what is getting you worked up.
Could it just be harmless chatting? If you’re not sure how to tell, there are some behaviors that signal it’s merely innocent conversation: She’s polite to other men when she talks to them, but not over-the-top gushy. She frequently involves you in those conversations. And she isn’t touching these guys, flipping her hair, or making goo-goo eyes at them. You know the drill. So be honest with yourself.